tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2322140320680326931.post1000525348952722345..comments2023-11-02T09:33:26.807-05:00Comments on Baby Love Slings: If no Grief, then no Joy?Farrahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09007898882390399053noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2322140320680326931.post-608154197495517382009-04-21T13:42:00.000-05:002009-04-21T13:42:00.000-05:00i am sorry that people have been telling you what ...i am sorry that people have been telling you what your grief should be like. i don't think that we can prescribe grief or joy. it seems like you can't make yourself feel one way or another. i wish people would just walk alongside of you instead of telling you how to feel. i'm sorry about that...Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16908859022102034063noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2322140320680326931.post-56130322714163418452009-04-21T06:16:00.000-05:002009-04-21T06:16:00.000-05:00hi, I found you through Heather's blog.
Five years...hi, I found you through Heather's blog.<br />Five years ago, i had a son, who died at five days of age and I have to say I echo everything you write. Five years has been incredibly hard for me, harder than all but the first year. What's more is that I feel as though I have not been able to talk about it as much, the expectation that I will be over it overshadows everything.<br /><br />I have twins, who are three, almost four. They came quickly after my son and I am often reminded that they may not be here, if William was. It makes me feel cranky. Why say that? Why do that to a grieving mother. I love Ivy and Noah more than life itself, they are in no way a replacement to William and I could never ever choose between them. I wish I had all of them.<br /><br />I am so sorry that your sweet little guy isn't here and I feel for you. Grief doesn't just go away.tiffhttp://mythreeringcircus.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2322140320680326931.post-18516493472521037712009-04-20T14:38:00.000-05:002009-04-20T14:38:00.000-05:00Dear Farrah, I am praying for you this week. No w...Dear Farrah, I am praying for you this week. No words that I offer will be adequate, but I know that the comfort that comes from the Holy Spirit is exactly, precisely what you need. He will hold you in the midst of the joy and grief.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03954179323097955442noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2322140320680326931.post-65685727497058958832009-04-20T07:15:00.000-05:002009-04-20T07:15:00.000-05:00One thing that has helped me get through times of ...One thing that has helped me get through times of grief-that seem unfair, wondering why God allowed it, is the story of Lazurus. When Jesus weeps, it spoke to me and reminded me that in those times of pain, our Lord is crying with us-so sorry that we have to go through the pain, yet having a plan and knowing it is the best course of action. And still, He is hurt that we are hurt. That has been a great comfort to me. I hope you can find some comfort in it too.Atwood-Family of FIVEhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08787773315886171839noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2322140320680326931.post-11079336840311701622009-04-19T20:05:00.000-05:002009-04-19T20:05:00.000-05:00I love you, friend, and am praying for you especia...I love you, friend, and am praying for you especially this week. <br /><br />I think you are touching on something so true in this post, something that is at the heart of the Gospel. There is suffering and joy in life, and often one has to walk through some really hard suffering to experience the full depth of joy. That must be one of the lessons we learn at the cross.<br /><br />I know that I would give anything to have my daddy back, and the grief of losing a parent is not nearly as deep as that of losing a child...at least I don't think what I went through was as difficult as the journey you have had to walk these five years. I don't know. But I do know that there are some areas of life that are more real and true and joyful, including my relationships with my family, than they would be if we hadn't been through my dad's illness and death. <br /><br />Mostly I just now that I am ready for the promise of Easter to be fulfilled. Then we get the fullness of joy with the promise of no more death or mourning or crying or pain. Then all of these horrible things that we have to go through now will be made beautiful, and all six of our boys will get to hang out together. <br /><br />I love you and wish we could be up there this week.TwoSquareMealshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01000292109449832461noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2322140320680326931.post-68285541077608474722009-04-19T17:05:00.000-05:002009-04-19T17:05:00.000-05:00This was a beautiful, honest, heartfelt and brave ...This was a beautiful, honest, heartfelt and brave post. <br /><br />Grief is a deeply personal experience. No one can tell you how to do it; there is no one proper way to grieve.<br /><br />Your love for all of your boys comes through on this blog. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts at this difficult time.Kim Moldofskyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01370371961001629766noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2322140320680326931.post-67086768550797501002009-04-19T09:52:00.000-05:002009-04-19T09:52:00.000-05:00I have no way to say anything that would in anyway...I have no way to say anything that would in anyway 'fix' this. You know what I have been through in terms of loss and grief. <br /><br />I do not think that especially on anniversaries or other meaningful days that just remembering is a reasonable expectation at least not so soon.<br /><br />5 years in context of our children's lives is a long time. But in the context of our lives not so long. <br /><br />grieve how you need to. acute grief is completely normal (not to say to make anything better just maybe to make you feel a little less odd)<br /><br />Please know that I am a phone call away...and heck if you need a change of scene you know where the key is.Just Mehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09613843318204543298noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2322140320680326931.post-57654663255400621082009-04-19T09:49:00.000-05:002009-04-19T09:49:00.000-05:00After Mom died, it took around ten years for me to...After Mom died, it took around ten years for me to stop looking back at that and start looking forward. As write this now, I realize I need a moment to recall the day she died, or how long she's been gone. But that's only happened over this past year.<br />What I finally realized nearly eleven years into the bargain was that I was(am?) scared of facing life <I>without</I> this grief. I have been so used to looking back, that looking forward is something new, something scary. That all-consuming grief was also, in a way, my comfort, my excuse.. my everything. <br />It's been barely a few months since I started looking forward instead of back.. and in so many ways it's harder and so much more rewarding than life used to be. <br />I felt the turning-point was when I realized I'm happy being who I am now, and Mom's death is just a part of what made me that way. Yes I miss her, I miss having steady adult guidance in my life, but I also realize the wealth of things I can think, feel, understand and do because I lost her.<br /><br />I hear you on not knowing <I>how</I> to grieve. I don't think I do, yet. Writing this is, for me, a part of resolving my own residual pain. But I know it's going to get better. Thinking of "what if"s will only keep me bogged down in the past longer, and that's what I want to avoid at all costs.Sukhalokahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08839282055547314024noreply@blogger.com